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Sunday, April 17, 2011

I am a bad blogger, but it's okay.

Today, I realized what a bad blogger I am. But I thought about it and have now come to terms with that fact. Here's why.

Then, I went ahead and turned it into a majestic waterfall. Because graphs are boring.

Feel free to ignore the lapse in appropriate proportions between the bear and the fish.

In conclusion, it should be very apparent that blogging has become a last resort when all other opportunities to procrastinate/waste time have been entirely exhausted. (Exhibit A: this post.)

It's a list day.

Things I would never (emotionally) regret having on tap in my room:

1) Raspberry Arizona Iced Tea
2) Costco's VitaRain (all four flavors)
3) Nutella
4) Ramen Noodles (Chicken flavor. I don't care who you are, the beef stuff is nasty.)

Things that are only okay to do in public when you are the gym:

1) Run maniacally in place
2) Sweat profusely
3) Look at your stomach in the mirror
4) Grunt with exertion
5) Wear spandex body suits

Things that I should never have discovered, but love anyway:

1) The internet, in general
2) Ramen noodles
3) CVS
4) Microsoft Paint

Dance moves that are always/never appropriate:

1) The vague crump
2) Pelvic thrusts
3) Indiscriminate air punches with occasional kicks
4) Step-tap-clap/snap
5) Fist pump (This is NOT the same as # 3.)

This has been a disappointing post, especially after neglecting you all for such a long while. Oh...wait...yup, I'm over it.

Enjoy reality!

3 comments:

  1. Discover Photoshop; optimize reality.

    Also, "frequence."

    ReplyDelete
  2. I actually really enjoyed this post.

    "And the Lord said, "Let there be chicken flavored Ramen noodles." And he saw that it was good. Unfortunately, someone came along and made other flavors, and the Lord let it happen anyway, very unwillingly."

    Also, I imagine it would be difficult to have Nutella on tap. Perhaps a bottomless jar of Nutella?

    ReplyDelete
  3. http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/frequence?show=0&t=1303100416

    It's okay.

    ReplyDelete